Mombarian & the Cave Dragon

So if you follow me on Twitter or have read some of my blog posts then you know that for the last 6+ months I've been playing a barbarian in a work game. For a little bit more backstory on that check out my 'Playing Against Stereotype - My Mombarian' post. But I'm playing an interesting spin on the barbarian and have therefore become the group's mom. Every group has one, and if you are thinking 'naw mine doesn't have one' then I hate to break it to you but you are the group mom. Its not always a conscious thing but it has to do with the kind of player you are OR what kind of character you want to play. Sticking to not killing all the things and looting can be a hard thing to do so typically your paladins and clerics take on the role of group mom. I mean with the gentle heals and light bringing buffs they are a perfect fit.

I'm getting sidetracked again though. We have been exploring this tunnel and underground system after a rather traumatic experience with the main antagonist, a Goddess of Magic who has gone mad and decided to destroy all magic, that ended in one player killing their animal companion and another killing their potential girlfriend cause mind effery. Obviously after all of that we lept at going back into the tomb thing we had explored before to completionist that thing and have some warm fuzzes in the form of loot. Which lead to us finding a hole in the ground that disappeared into the darkness so a few silk rope shenanigans later (aka falling) we were deep cave exploring. Now something you might not know about my homegirl Nakon yet, she speaks Draconic. Why? A part of her backstory is she left her tribe and traveled with a group of merchants before meeting up with the rest of the party. I decided that she made besties with a Dragonborn Monk (hold over from when I first tried to play her in another company's D&D game - shout out to that Dragonborn we are still cannon lift bros) that was also traveling with the merchants. This is important cause like any good cave there were Kobolds... and my DM forgot I spoke Draconic.

We are getting shot from holes in the walls and hearing things behind them, managing to pour acid and shatter stone to some monster screams we find out they are manned things and not triggered traps. In steps my knowledge bringing fighter buddy with the book smarts and we find out that the small tracks and vaguely describable body we find is a dragon like mini me (for all ya'll out there Kobolds, they were Kobolds). Now they know we are there so they start taunting us and I ask if they are dragon like lizards does that mean they are speaking Draconic. That was when the DM remembered I spoke it and I ran with so much fun taunting and insulting them back. Through which I found out they were trying to herd us to their god for sacrifice... FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU we are going to have to fight a dragon. I'd like to point out my character knew this and the other players, not the other characters cause I forgot I was speaking another language and just assumed they understood it too.

Despite doing our best to go down every other tunnel to not go down the tunnel leading down deeper into the depths, we eventually have no choice. It leads us through a tunnel with a drop down of 10 ft to another tunnel which seems to lead to an open cavern with a large river running through it. But the door has things dangling over it. Wormy tentacle bristle like things. OH HELL NAH BRO I AIN'T TOUCHING THAT! Was pretty much the instantaneous response of everyone in the group. Like come on you don't survive adventuring in D&D for this long and go around touching random dangly bits, none of us our bards. So we held out fire to it and guess what? It was a mother-effing Cave Dragon! (Hey look the monster from the post title)

Now some of you might not know about what a Cave Dragon is and honestly I didn't either so I'm going to do a thing I have kept from doing in posts up to this point and just include a little image of what that looks like.

Those like seemingly spikey bits? Yeah those are the wormy tentacle bristle like things I mentioned earlier. Thankfully our lovely brainy fighter can tell that its a young dragon, cause we'd be dead otherwise. It has no eyes so its blind but probably has truesight or blindsight. Oh yeah and fun fact IT CAN SWIM THROUGH STONE WITHOUT LEAVING A TRACE IF IT DOESN'T WANT TO AND WE ARE UNDERGROUND IN A CAVE SYSTEM OF DUG OUT STONE. Our fun little Cave Dragon buddy is a little gift to the DMs of the world from Kobold Press' 'Tome of Beasts'. So yeah. Hate those guys. (JK I love you this was a joy as a player to fight against, as a character not so much cause threat of dying)

It then starts talking about how it can't believe we are its yummy little snacks, its so hungry oh so hungry. Our rogue and ranger instantly start trying to wheel and deal with it - 'oh we will bring you food you don't need to eat us think of all the additional food you could eat because we brought it to you'. They however left out mentioning that the fighter, cleric and I were part of this 'we' they kept talking about. Which wasn't obvious until the fighter asked what it would like to eat which received a 'oh well you'll FEED ME' over and over. This thing was going to eat us. We were going to be nice crunchy little snacks.

Now at this point I had a choice, as a player I didn't want to have to fight a dragon especially one I knew nothing about if I didn't have to. I was all for wheeling and dealing and tricking. But my character protects those she feel are weaker or that are close to her. She doesn't abide evil creatures. She knows if its young now that when it grows older it will be strong enough to leave the cave without fear and this whole large area of people with families is screwed. So I looked at the brainy fighter and the bumbling cleric, I looked at the heart collecting rogue and the human ranger with no darkvision. I look back at the brainy fighter and bumbling cleric and then sigh. "I can't leave here without that dragon being dead. Its evil and will hurt people the second its strong enough to do so. Its gluttony and hunger know no bounds so it would be foolish to waste its weakness by fattening and strengthening it up." The ranger and rogue bolt as I get a nod from the fighter and cleric. This thing is on.

Oh its opening move? Effing poison cloud breath. Did I mention I hated this dragon? Cleric starts slinging spells from far away, ranger shoots from so far away its not even funny, the rogue is gone, the fighter tries to get out of range and I rage out to smack it with my weapon. Why would I be this insane? BECAUSE I'M A TEAM PLAYER. Playing as an Ancestral Guardian the first thing I whack while raging means that thing is super less effective attack my party members...which also means its probably going to attack me alot. Which it did. Now Nakon has like high 50's for health so she is a little beefy girl. But she get into the single digits a few times but kept chugging thanks to a heal spell and a well chugged potion.

But you aren't here for a play by play - The fight was fucking tough but ended with the dragon falling off of the ceiling where it was clinging like some weird lizard spider and falling onto stones before sliding into the river. The river of course being our only feasible way out of this place, where the dragon fell. Also we aren't super sure that buddy is dead just that it got knocked down. Everyone is freaking out, I'm freaking out. I don't want to go into a stone tunnel on a river with a Cave Dragon lurking about. Also Nakon really wants to harvest some stuff from it cause I'm gathering a collection of monster bits (I have like 2000 Vrock feathers) and our rogue wants its heart. The ranger casts their little spell to detect dragons and the DM makes a point of saying they don't feel anything WITHIN THE MILE. We do the only logical thing next thing and use my javelins to create points where we can get deeper out into the river and look around. I see nothing. I also start floating off down the river, the other follow using the carcasses of giant scorpions from the dragon's last meal to float down after me.

That ladies, gents, and genltepersons is just a normal night in the life of this D&D group and I love every second of it. This group has been an amazing thing to be a part of these past 6+ months and have helped me really enjoy this new company. Getting to know your coworkers in sometimes a scary way, heart stealing (literally) rogue I'm looking at you, just kind of bonds you all for when you face off against someone with no idea what is going on yelling at you. Honestly I suggest it for anyone in a SaaS company or really any company where you have to interact with customers on a regular basis cause ain't nobody got your back like your D&D buds.

With that little rambling over with, I’m JustKay your regular DM Dalliance on the web and I’ll see you next post.